Hey there traders!
Okay I’ll let you in on something. NEW BOURNE MOVIE! BORN4 is going nowhere but up! It’s selling at H$76 now, after an initial spike up to H$89 and a settle. Now that the stock has spiked once, it’s going up up to H$100 before the summer is over!
Also, I promised to explain to you in a post how I’m making fake money off the demise of two Hollywood legends. Here it is: Buy Paul Newman (PNEWM). He’s on his way out and he is way under priced for death! He’s trading at H$55 today, with a TAG of 84 million! This means when he kicks it, the bond will adjust to H$84! Sorry Cars 2! This is the attitude a trader has to have if he is going to make it out here in Hollywood. No mercy for the cancerous!
Short Patrick Swayze (PSWAY). The bond is overweight at H$10. Swayze’s TAG is just north of 3 million. Did you see Dirty Dancing 2: Havana Nights? Did Donnie Darko make money?
Swayze has the most deadly cancer; 1 in 5 people live more than 5 years with it. But you know what they say traders: who gives a shit? Short this bond and get paid. What’s Swayze gonna do – posses the body of Whoopi Goldberg from beyond the grave and come beat you up for it? Come into your office when you are trying to erase incriminating files from an 80s MAC and push the filing cabinet around to scare you?
But he’s a good actor and I feel bad about his dying for real.
Not Newman though. What a hack. The Quaker Oats guy is a better actor.
I’m pretty troubled and pretty confused. And I’m afraid, really afraid. Really afraid. But I think you’re the fucking anti-christ.
That’s my favorite line ever delivered to Patrick Swayze. What yours?
Later traders!
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